Art by Jasper

I'm still pregnant! Jas has school off today so we are enjoying some Price is Right and Marshmallow Mateys cereal.

Below are some fun pictures Jasper drew recently. I think his picture of me is way too kind! If only my belly were so cute and tiny.

Fun with the scanner

My doctor's appointment went well and I'm still pregnant. I'm dilated to a 1 and I'm scheduled to be induced next Thursday the 23rd. I've been trying to cross my fingers that he'll decide to be born before that, but since I really can't even cross my fingers because they are so fat, he'll most likely be born next week.


I'm having so much fun with the scanner, I'm about to embarrass myself with these pictures, but I don't really care.


I served a mission for my church in Honduras, San Pedro Sula - and in Belize (2000-2001). Belize is small so it is not a mission itself, just an extension of other missions. It was once part of Guatemala, then Honduras, now it is part of El Salvador.

One of the first sisters I met in Honduras when I got there warned me "Sister, just so you know - the blessings of the mission are not physical." Luckily my two older sisters Heather and Becky who had both served missions before me also told me some of the horror stories and I had already resigned myself to gaining 20 lbs from eating tortillas.

But there were other physical yuckiness that I wasn't really prepared for, like flying ants, fleas in your disgusting 3rd world mattress that scarred my legs for years, HEAT, the never ending HEAT and humidity, worms, food that looks back at you while you eat it, etc.

It was definitely very humbling. And sometimes when I see the sister missionaries on Temple Square with their beautiful clothes, hair and make up, none of which I had on my mission, I just have to smile. I would've loved to look like that on my mission, but there was just no way. You can't wear a suit outfit in the middle of Central America - first of all its WAY too hot. Second, its impractical to walk 3 or 4 miles a day in one of those (we had no car or bike - people steal them and dogs chase you). Third, I gained so much weight I didn't fit into any of my cute outfits anyway after a month in the field, so it was down to jumpers and skirts pretty quickly. And there is no point in wearing makeup when it literally melts off of your face 20 minutes after application.

So this was me in the MTC the day my parents dropped me off. Look how cute and naive. I even have the lovely dork dot.





And this is a few days before I went back to Utah (I have better, more painful looking pictures, but they are packed up in boxes and I'm too fat to get them down, plus I will spare you).

It was right after 9/11 and we were at the Belizean airport. I'm the one with the back pack on my lap hiding my tummy. I showed this picture to Jasper, hoping he wouldn't be able to identify me. But he found me right away, and said something like, "you're all shiny like a football player."



I guess I'll make a lame comparison to pregnancy and say that the blessings of being pregnant are not physical. But the pros definitely outweigh the cons!

Fourth Grade Pictures

How cute is Jasper? Very.

These are his fourth grade pictures:



He said the photographer told him to tilt his head, and say "Girls are cute!" but he just said "Cheese" instead, and hopped out of the chair before he could make him say it.

Oh, and still no baby.

Last Appointment

Today is my last Dr. Appointment before I have a baby.

I'm due TOMORROW.

Now that is scary, just like this picture of me at age 12.

Halloween Flashback

Becky and I at the Clinton parade. Becky is cowboy #1 with red bandana, and I'm cowboy #2 with the hat and brown overalls. Our mother loved us so much she gave us matching boy haircuts that year. I'm not even sure this is Halloween. I think its some kind of Cowboy parade. Oh and if you look really carefully I think you can see Heather in the far background with the mullett and red bandana and my dad with a blue Co-op hat and sunglasses.

Still No Baby

Football games in the rain = cold! Jasper had fun because they won, and David always has fun watching him play. I stayed warm with a hot chocolate, blanket and winter coat.


A soundless video of Jasper doing "Husky-jacks":






And still no Baby Bennett. My doctor's appointment on Thursday went much better, and I'm all healthy and so is the baby. But he has no intention of leaving my body any time soon. It can't be comfortable in there, what is he waiting for?


Jasper has been thinking of what to be for Halloween. Here are some of his ideas:

• Grim Reaper




• Indiana Jones




• Toilet Bowl




• Zombie




• Werewolf

David and I tried helping by throwing out ideas. Here were a few of ours:

• Be the tooth fairy! He said "No way, that is something that Todd would do." (His uncle Todd dressed up like a cheerleader a few years ago, I think that is what he means)




• A pumpkin




• A Ghost

He thought these were all lame ideas. Then he comes up with "I know, I could be Michelle! Pregnant Michelle! I'd win the nobel prize for that costume." Yeah, we have no idea why he thinks dressing up like me is nobel prize worthy. Pretty funny.

I'm having fun with the scanner. Here is me as a Punk Rocker circa 1989.

No baby

I'm still pregnant.

This morning Jasper won his game against Granger, we are all psyched!

My pictures from the game won't upload, but now the scanner works, so I found this fun picture of me and my friends in Chicago November/December 2005 (?). This was outside the Cheescake Factory after a day of shopping and sightseeing.

Pregnancy pics

I finally figured out that our printer/scanner has a place where you can upload pictures straight from your memory card - no usb cord necessary (my usb connection is broken on my camera)!


Here are some pregnancy pictures that I know you have all been dying to see:

Lagoon, 6/6/08 - approx 5 months pregnant.

Attempt at self portrait with my camera timer.

7/6/08 - 6 months.

At the family baby shower - cute baby pants!

Taken 8/29/08 - 7 months

These last three were taken today, 9 months pregnant! I think it looks like I stuffed one of those red dodgeballs up my shirt.

And a few fun quotes from Jasper, on my way home from picking him up from school today:

Jasper: Guess what?
Me: What?
Jasper: When I was 2, I had this crazy idea, that you just pooed the baby out. But I only thought that for like two seconds.

Jasper: Guess what?
Me: What?
Jasper: My teacher sometimes tells me that I need to be more silent.
Me: Really? Well I guess you must talk too much or too loudly. You better try harder to be quiet.
Jasper: But I'm soooo good! I'm so good cuz I'm not even slapping people around.

More Doctor's Orders

So my real doctor ordered me home from work. That's right, I'm being forced to stay home, put my feet up and eat bon bons (well maybe not the bon bon part, but I'm taking liberties).

I went to my weekly pregnancy checkup, and had high blood pressure, some protein in my urine and some rapid weight gain. Then my doctor took a look at my feet and shook his head in pity "those are some of the most swollen feet I've ever seen." So I had to get some blood drawn and then I was sent down to Labor and Delivery for a "non-stress test." What in the heck is a non-stress test? Well I had no idea, but it didn't sound like a big deal.

Meanwhile at home Dave was waiting for me to get home so he could leave and go to Ogden with some friends. He'd been planning this outing for a few weeks. After I was told I had to take these tests, I called and told him to go ahead. "It's just a blood test and some kind of stress test thing, it won't take any time I'm sure. I'll be done in time to pick up Jasper from school and take him to practice. It's no big deal, just go, I'll be fine!" So he reluctantly headed up to Ogden.

After the blood draw I made my way downstairs to Labor and Delivery and told them that my doctor had sent me down for a non-stress test. Okay. Then they gave me all these forms to sign. While handing me each form, the check-in lady would say stuff like "If you give birth today, do you want an epidural?" "If you stay and have the baby, do you want the baby to be immunized with the Hepatitis B vaccine?" "If you end up giving birth, who will the baby's pediatrician be?"

Now I started to freak a little.

Me: You realize I'm just here for the non-stress test right?"

Check-in lady: Yes.

Me: Is this a big deal?

Check-in lady: well, not really. We're making sure everything is okay.

Me: What IS a non-stress test?

Check-in lady: We'll attach some monitors to your belly and listen to him, make sure he is okay, check your blood pressure.

Me: Okay. How long does this usually take?

Check-in lady: Well it depends, it could take 20 minutes, or you could stay and give birth. :)

Now really scared, I called Dave back and told him sorry but I had no idea how long it would take and he better come home. So he of course got freaked out too, and turned right around.

Luckily my blood pressure was back to normal and the baby was fine, so they sent me home after monitoring me and baby for about an hour and gave me strict instructions to take it easy and not return to work. The nurse also admired the state of my feet. "I've never seen feet like that before," she said in awe. I admit I am pretty happy to not be at work this very minute.

It sure made everything seem more real. I will be having this baby very soon. Ahh! I need to get my house clean, I need to pack a bag to take to the hospital. I need to finish the baby dresser, plant some fall bulbs, and do some relaxing.

So, what TV series on DVD do you think I should bring to the hospital with me? Chances are I'll be in labor for a few hours or more. What should I watch to make the time fly? Poll to the right.

Oh, and what do you think, when will I have this baby? Comment and leave your guess on his date of arrival, and weight.

Law and Order

I love Law and Order. My favorite is the original, and I also love SVU (although I always want to call it SUV). I love Sgts. Briscoe and Green, Lt. Van Buren and of course Jack McCoy. I could watch it all day, even when they always air the episodes I've seen 14 times. David doesn't like the show (!), but then I can't stand most of his shows either.

Who loves Law and Order - or what's a show you could watch reruns of over and over?

Gimme more

Why is Arby's so skimpy with the sauce? Every time I go through an Arby's drive through I ask for extra Arby's sauce. Almost every time I still only end up with 1 or 2 sauce packets. That is not EXTRA.

Doctor's Orders

I wrote this email to my sister Becky:



On Wed, Sep 24, 2008 at 9:08 AM, Michelle wrote:

Can't breathe. . . Can't walk. . . Puffy.



And she replied:



From: Becky
Sent: Wednesday, September 24, 2008 3:52 PM
To: Michelle


Miss Puffy,

Please lie in bed an extra hour and eat bon bons and watch Felicity reruns.

Love, Dr. Becky


Aren't sisters great?

Football prep

Friday nights are the nights before Jasper's football games. He has to be at the field at 8 am, so last night I tried to have him get as ready as possible the night before.

Me: Jasper, get me all your football gear, so I can wash it and have it all ready for tomorrow.
Jasper: Okay
Me: Bring me everything, okay? That means your jersey, pants, socks, jockstrap/cup, helmet and pads.
Jasper: blank stare.
Me: So what do you need to bring me?
Jasper: blank stare.
Me: okay, go get me your Jersey, pants and socks.
Jasper: heads to his room.

5 minutes later, he appears with his jersey.

Me: okay, now go get me your socks and underwear.
Jasper: okay.

10 minutes later he appears with his socks and underwear - with the cup still inside.

Me: Can you take the cup out of your underwear?
Jasper: How come?
Me: Cuz I have to wash it and I don't want to touch this more than I have to.
Jasper: Okay.
Me: Now, what else do I need?
Jasper: Shrug of shoulders.
Me: I need your pants.

He was in his room "looking" for about 15 minutes. I knocked on his door.

Me: Need help?
Jasper: silence
Me: What are you doing in there?
Jasper: silence

So I enter his room - which is a complete disaster area. He's laying on his bed, head down on his pillow.


Me: Have you found your pants yet?
Jasper: I can't find them anywhere!

At this point I'm really tired so David steps in and helps Jas find the rest of his stuff. I was having a very swollen ornery day and I went to bed. David cautiously wakes me up, "honey, can you just tell me how to use the washing machine?" In his defense, we recently bought a new set of front loading washer/dryers. I've been happily doing all the laundry in the new laundry room that Dave finished adding onto the house, using my new washer and dryer. So I showed him how to use it and went back to bed.

I'm pretty sure Jasper is a typical 9 year old with a messy room and a short attention span.

Is it too late to change my mind?

*I googled "scared of childbirth" and this is one of the images that appeared.

David and I went to a childbirth/prenatal class today. This was our first one, and we have one more class next Saturday. It was good, very informative - and very scary. I'm freaked out! I don't want to give birth! Is there any other way to have this baby? I know its a little late. . . but it just looks freaking horrible. I know it will be worth it of course, and I already love this baby so much. I love feeling him move and kick - that is my favorite thing. But I just almost want to throw up thinking about labor and pushing and all the potential complications.



On a lighter note - Jasper won his game today against Bountiful. It is pretty funny getting ready for games every Saturday morning. Every week he asks us what color jersey and pants to wear. Every week I tell him "Your black pants" or "white jersey this time!" Every week he never believes me. "Are you sure??" he asks. "Yes, I'm positive." Three minutes later I hear him asking David "Dave, what colors am I supposed to wear?" Dave tells him the same thing. And then always Jasper follows up with "Can I just call Coach and ask, please?" We have yet to be wrong - I don't know where this skepticism comes from, but its pretty cute.

Go Huskies!

Although the game was ultimately lost, Jasper sure looks good out there, doesn't he?

He is #51.

Here he is tackling. . .




And tackling some more. . .

And taking a drink . . .

And running.

Better luck next game!

Pregnancy Update

How is my pregnancy going? I'm not a fan of this last trimester. I had no idea moving around would be so hard. Basic things like putting on shoes (yeah slip ons!), turning in bed and walking have become huge undtertakings. Working fulltime while pregnant is really hard too. I can see why many women take their maternity leave a few weeks before their due date. I'm gonna try and stick it out until the very end though. As for the baby name, we still aren't 100%, although we have a name we both like. I think I'm gonna keep it a secret though.

Oh, and I'm suffering from a huge case of water retention. Isn't it lovely?

Sad thing is, these pictures don't even do justice to the way my feet, ankles and hands are swollen.

I have 6 weeks left, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, but man, I'm getting ready for this to be done!

Horses and a Haircut

On Monday we buzzed off Jasper's hair (so handsome!) and went to Clinton and rode my parent's horses. I got to watch from the sidelines and it was a perfect day for riding. It had rained pretty hard early in the morning, but by the time we rode it was just right.

David and I were the last ones in at the barn, and unfortunately neither of us tied up the gate behind us. Jasper was up helping my dad with some hay in the loft and looked out and saw all the horses running away. "Are they supposed to be out of the gate?" he asked my dad. "WHOA get the horses!" Dad yelled. Running and panic ensued. Heather, Anne-Marie, Staci and David ran after them with some enticing oats, Heather tried to cut them off before they got to the highway, and Jasper's and my job was to stand by the gate cutting off the other road to the highway and to hold our arms out.

Eventually they finally got the horses rounded up and we got them back in the corral. Pedro the goat followed them their whole journey because he thinks he is a horse. The run was a bit too much for him, and he got back to the barn panting.

In all the excitement, Heather cursed mildly and it did not escape Jasper's attention.

Jasper: Heather, you said a curse word.

Heather: I know, oops.

Jasper: That means you have to lick a bar of soap.

Heather: Um, nope.

I don't have any pictures (of course) of the escape, but I do have some of Jasper riding after all the horses had calmed down.

Happy Birthday Ree!

It's Anne-Marie's Birthday!

Ree loves:

Jason Castro of American Idol fame

The Utah Jazz

Go Boozer!

Mulder and Scully

Shopping. . .

Just kidding. I don't know many people who hate to shop worse than Anne-Marie.

And of course. .

HOT POCKETS!

Happy Birthday, I love you little sis!

I'm Magic!

Yesterday I was cutting two pieces of homemade bread as late night snacks for me and David (I fondly call it homemade bread when it is actually Rhodes Bake-N-Serve, but let's face it, that is the closest to homemade as I'll ever be baking). As I cut the bread I turned my body to the left and I suddenly heard this "click click click" sound. I looked down and saw that my huge tummy had magically turned the knob on the self-igniting gas range, and the flame took off ready to cook. Pregnancy is helpful in so many ways!

Toots

Jasper: "I think I know why I am constipated."
Me: "Oh yeah, why?"
Jasper: "Cause you won't let me toot. You won't let me or Dave toot in the house or in the car."
Me: "Um. . . I don't think that makes you constipated."
Jasper: "Uh-huh. Because if you hold it in, it makes you all stuffed up."
Me: "Well, I don't say you can't toot EVER, just not all over the house or in the car. You can toot in the bathroom anytime you want."
Jasper: "Well, just letting you know that that's the reason I'm constipated."

Later after I told David of Jasper's funny theory, he said

"Well, he does have a good point." Why are boys so gross and fart happy?


While I'm on the subject, I think it is funny that when I was growing up, my mom wouldn't let us say the word "fart." We had to use the word "windy." Hilarious.

Put your toys away

How to tell if a 9 year old boy doesn't really care about a toy:

Me: Jasper, this toy thingy here (some kind of playdough mush he made at summer camp)? I'm throwing it away.

Jasper: NO! PLEASE!

David: Okay, but you have to put it away then.

Jasper: Uh, okay - you can just throw it away.

Scary and Sad

What's scary?

Shucking corn. You never know what you are going to find when you get down to the kernels.

What's sad?

After shucking all the corn (corn you picked from the garden in your backyard), cooking it, buttering, salting and peppering it, you take a big bite and it is like mush. I think we waited too long before we picked it. That is sad.

Observations at Practices and Preseason Games

Friday David and I went to Jasper's football practice, and today was his first game. It was a preseason game, and his first game that counts is next Saturday. He is so excited. The practices are long and hot but he loves them. It is fun to watch all the 8-9 year old boys, and how much fun they are having. Kid watching can be the most entertaining form of people watching there is.



Since their game was the next day, their coach kept going over plays again and again. It would be so hard to coach kids Jasper's age, they lose interest quickly and are so easily distracted. When the coach catches someone talking when he's supposed to be listening, or goofing off, he yells "Drop and give me 5 push ups!" and the kid quickly obeys. I've about doing that at home, but somehow I doubt I would get such an obedient and willing response out of Jasper at home.



Anyway, as I was watching the practice I noticed some pretty funny things.



As the coach was going over a play, a few kids that were on the sidelines but were still supposed to be paying attention, started talking smack and telling "Yo mama's so ugly" jokes. Most of them were actually, "yo mama's so hairy" jokes instead.



When there were still about 20 minutes left of practice, the "coach mother" pulled out some treats that she'd be giving each kid as they left, some oversized pixy stix. I heard one boy tell another "PIXY STIX, LOOK!" And then the field was a buzz with every kid telling the other that they'd get pixy stix soon. They missed everything the coach said and had to drop and give 5 push ups.



My favorite part of the practice came as the coach was giving his final huddle pep talk.



Coach: "The game starts tomorrow morning at 9 am. You must all be here at 8 am!"

Kid 1: "What if we're here at 8:30?"

Kid 2: "I usually sleep in until 10:40."

Kid 3: "What if we forget and sleep in?"

Frustrated Coach: "If you aren't here at 8, you won't play! If you sleep in until 10:40, you won't play, if you forget, you won't play!"

Kid 4: "What time again?"





Last night as Jasper was getting ready for bed, he came into my room brushing his teeth. He was so excited for today's game he was dancing and singing. He said to me (somehow I was able to decipher it though his mouth was filled with toothpaste) "I can't wait for tomorrow, we're gonna KILL Cottonwood!" I gave him five and then he tried to fist bump me, but I totally missed the fist.



The game came and went. Jasper's team was amazing and won 19-0. They were all so happy! Jasper played well and even tackled the running back twice! Watching kids play football is much more entertaining than watching the NFL. I even enjoyed it!



I promise I'll fix my camera soon. It won't upload, but I got some great action shots.

1970s photos

My friend Em had this on her blog, and I died laughing. So I thought I would steal her idea. You can do this yourself at http://www.yearbookyourself.com/.




David's photo is set in 1970,











While mine is in 1976.

Ugly Photo Tag

There are some things that no amount of photoshopping can fix.

This is an Ugly Photo Tag. I dare you all to post an ugly picture of yourself. C'mon, it'll be fun. :)

Girls Camp

So my friend Heidi was going through some old pictures, and found this gem of me at girls camp circa 1990. I thought it was funny. I must be thinking something like "whose comb is this?"

Synchronized Diving

Is anyone else watching the synchronized diving in the Olympics?

They are pretty cool. But the lady commentator for this event is very annoying. She sounds like Nancy Grace. I wish I could mute the commentators sometimes, without turning off all of the sound.

The Olympics have begun!

How comfortable would you feel dressed like this playing beach volleyball for all the world to see? Maybe if I had a body like theirs I'd feel comfortable, but somehow I still doubt it. I'd be too worried about making sure that all my body parts stayed covered. It doesn't seem to bother them much though. Go team USA!

Worrie Wart

Jasper: "I stink real bad. Can I take a shower?"

Me: "Um. . . yes please!"

Jasper: "I smell like this friend I use to have's house."

Me: "What did your friend's house smell like?"

Jasper: "Well, they use to barf in their house and not clean it up."

Me: "Hurry quickly and take a shower NOW!"

So I'm now 29 weeks pregnant, 7 months and in my third trimester. I'm in the homestretch and getting more and more nervous. I now meet with my doctor every two weeks. I keep thinking of all the horrible things that could happen. I've had friends and family, and ward members who have had really sad things happen to them and their babies in this third trimester, and my mind keeps racing and imagining up all sorts of "what-ifs". What if I go into labor prematurely? What if my baby dies? What if for some reason I can't have an epidural and I have to have an insane labor without meds? What if my ankles swell even more, and I have to be wheelchair bound for the remaining pregnancy? What if we never finish the basement, and the baby's nursery is permanently in the living room? What if he comes out an octopus (he already feels like he has 8 legs with the amount of kicking and bouncing that goes on in my engorged tummy)?

I know that most of the above is out of my hands and I need to think positively and not about all the things that could go wrong, but sometimes that is easier said than done.

Thank goodness Jasper is good for a laugh!